Sam's Crystal Ball tells: Bush will win in the United States Supreme Court

I peered into my crystal ball and my magic wand told me: Bush is going to win in the United States Supreme Court.

How do I know this? It's real simple: The United States Supreme Court consists of seven Republicans and two Democrats. Ergo: George DWI Bush wins!

Although two of the Republicans have some morality and ethics and will vote according to established legal precedent, that leaves a majority who will vote according to whom they want to win.

Everybody knows that if all the votes are counted, Gore will win Florida by a wide margin.

Ever since my daughter was kidnapped when she was eight years old and I found out that there was no way in Hell that I was going to get her back, I learned that "Truth, Justice and the American Way" means that the judges of the courts are totally corrupt and make their decisions for reasons of political expediency. Of course, being smart men, the Justices of the United States Supreme Court will come up with some plausible sounding reasoning as to why their candidate should become president.

I am especially disappointed in Rehnquist who, in a hundred decisions I can cite for you, has written that for reasons of comity and federalism, the federal courts must respect the highest court of any state for a determination of the law of that state. However, in order to get his own man in, Rehnquist has thrown out all the case law that he wrote over the past nearly three decades in order to insure a Bush presidency.

Sam Sloan


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