In connection with the article entitled "Is a Recall Now Possible?", here is a reading comprehension test for chess kids. One of the issues before the USCF is whether kids should be allowed to vote in USCF elections. I am in favor of giving kids the right to vote, provided that a mechanism can be established wherein there are assurances that the kids themselves are really voting and the votes are not being controlled by the chess organizers who recruited the kids to join.

Woody Harris

I believe that the following test should be distributed to all chess playing kids and that the requirement be made that they be able to pass this reading test before being allowed to vote. This test requires some chess and general knowledge but is primarily based on the article "Is a Recall Now Possible?"

(a) Ever since he was elected USCF President in August, 1996
(b) Ever since John W. Collins taught Bobby Fischer how to play chess
(c) For more than 30 years, as a chess politician
(d) All his life, ever since he was born
(e) Don Schultz never lies

2. Who is Woodrow Harris? Woodrow Harris is:

(a) The full name of Woody the Woodpecker, a character at Disney World in Orlando, Florida.
(b) A police officer in Virginia.
(c) A Juvenile Probation Officer whose job it is to steal kids from their parents, and the children often never get to see their mother or father again.
(d) A low level worker for a criminal gang headquartered in Richmond, Virginia.
(e) A chess player with a Class A rating.

3. Don Schultz allowed Woody Harris to run the meetings in Orlando, Florida because:

(a) Mickey Mouse made him do it.
(b) He knew that Woody was opposed to allowing direct elections by the members for the officers of the USCF.
(c) Woody was the chairman of the Bylaws Committee.
(d) Don Schultz had a sore throat.
(e) Everybody likes Woody Harris.

Don Schultz

4. Under the One Man One Vote system as announced in the May, 1997 Chess Life, page 8, women are not allowed to vote because:

(a) Girls can't play chess.
(b) Women are limited in their ability to comprehend spatial relations.
(c) Chess is a war-like game, unsuitable for women.
(b) A separate organization called the "Committee on Women's Chess" is the exclusive body with authority over women's chess.
(e) All of the above.
(f) None of the above.

5. Virginia is:

(a) An integral part of the United States of America, which respects the laws and the rights of citizens of the other states on the basis of reciprocity, liberty, equality and fraternity.
(b) A Commonwealth which declared its independence from the United States in 1861 and where the laws of the States of the United States do not apply.
(c) An outlaw state which supports international terrorism and often sends criminal gangs across borders to kidnap children from their parents.
(d) A place which sends innocent men to their deaths in the electric chair several times a month.
(e) A place where it is illegal for a lesbian mother to have custody of her own child.
(f) b, c, d and e above.

6. Shamema is:

(a) A little chess-playing girl who was trained by the three Polgar sisters.
(b) A little girl who was kidnapped in the United Arab Emirates in 1990 and has never been recovered by either of her parents.
(c) A girl's name in Afghanistan.
(d) A girl who has been held prisoner for the past seven years through the cooperation and efforts of corrupt governmental authorities such as Woodrow Harris in Virginia.
(e) All of the above.