Fabulous Libertarian Dance Party

Tonight, I was invited to a Libertarian Party party. I expected to spend the evening in deep conversation with dour anarchists. What I found instead was something totally unexpected. It turned out to be a Libertarian Dance Party party.

Does it surprise you to learn that Libertarians Dance? It certainly surprised me, until I learned that the official Libertarian Party candidate for City Council District 4 is a professional dancer and dance instructor named Jak Karako.

What is professional dancer doing running for Manhattan City Council? He explained this rather easily.

As everybody knows, Mayor Giuliani has made himself popular by attacking just about every despised minority group in New York City. He has attacked taxi drivers, he has attacked hot dog venders and, in case you have not noticed, Giuliani has attacked professional dancers as well.

Giuliani has been sending out his morals squads to try to apprehend anyone caught dancing. A bar or a restaurant needs a cabaret license to allow dancing and Mayor Giuliani sends out his dance inspectors to try to apprehend those miscreants who dance without a license to do so.

Candidate Karako, after making a rousing speech about how evil and unjust this was, proceeded to demonstrate his art, dancing a slashy Argentine Tango with one of his students, Gonca Kartal, before an enthralled audience.

But that was only the beginning: Our next City Councilman then proceeded to introduce other dance teams who performed other dances.

The outstanding stars of the show, in my view, were Brendan McGlynn and Dana Simonetti, who preformed a Lindy Hop, a 1930s style swing dance.

They were really fantastic. I have never seen anything like it. It was later explained to me that this was quite a risky performance, because as he spun her around and literally twirled her over his head, there was a real danger that she might hit the ceiling, which was only ten feet up.

It was good that their performance was flawless, because there was no room for error there.

Needless to say, they have my vote, and I should hope that everyone votes for the Libertarian Party this year.

Which brings up the question:

The Libertarian Party has a wonderful platform and stands for only good things: They want small government, but are socially liberal. They want to eliminate income taxes or at least greatly reduce taxation. They want to repeal the laws against victimless crimes, such as the laws against dancing for example.

So, why every election year do they get few votes? Does anybody know?

Sam Sloan

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