Dirty Words from Sam Sloan

In case anybody doubts the truth and accuracy of what you are about to read here, one of my frequent critics made the following statement:

"Sam Sloan is nearly always right; the trouble is that his insights are so deep, and so far ahead of the time, that they appear incredible to the educated layman. I myself have occasionally made the mistake of thinking that Sam Sloan had made an error. Invariably, sometimes a year or more later, I had to admit my mistake."

"Jurgen R."

This is a real quote. You can find it yourself by searching at Chess Politics Newsgroup.

Now, here is a Quiz based on real quotes about me or by me. I did not create this quiz, nor did any friend of mine. Also, I am not "The Masked Sam Sloan". The Masked Sam Sloan is an unknown person or persons who writes attacks and parodies of me. You can find the answers to this quiz yourself by searching at http://groups-beta.google.com/group/rec.games.chess.politics

From: Nomen Nescio
Subject: Dirty Words from Sam Sloan et al
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 13:10:04 +0100 (CET)

You think you know who said what about whom in recent weeks. Test yourself, you may be surprised, and don't use google to cheat. In each case, (at least) one of the five suggested answers is correct. I'll post the correct attributions in the New Year, and then submit the whole thing for publication in Chess Life. Nowhere do I attribute quoted words to the quoter, but if someone writes 'Sam Sloan is wonderful at lying' then he can be nailed for 'Sam Sloan is wonderful'. It goes without saying that I don't endorse or necessarily agree with any of the material. The Masked Sam Sloan may not be Sam Sloan all of the time, it is amusing when Sam feels he has to remind us 'bout his claim not to know about the internet, remailers, no archive, etc. It must be Kayo who brews the Java, or Frank who does the HTML, and Liarry flies over every time Sammy is evicted or his computer seized so as to set up the new gear.


So who said each of the following? Sometimes it's not the obvious one...


1. Beatriz Marinello is the head of the gang of thieves that have taken over USCF. Her henchman is a guy named Hanke, who drives around with all of USCF's money in a suitcase in the trunk of his car, apparently because he doesn't trust banks. Marinello and Hanke are like Bonnie & Clyde.

Kayo Sloan?
Timothy Hanke?
Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?


2. What most of us are worried about is does this establish a precedent

Stan Booz?
Wick Deer?
petrel?
Phil Innes?
Sam Sloan?


3. Can we really afford to give control over such a large amount of money to someone whose immigrations [sic] status and perhaps even her real name is unknown?

Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
George Mirijanian?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Kayo Sloan?


4. I normally could never talk like this but I must sincerely say FUCK YOU SAM

Beatriz Marinello?
Timothy Hanke?
Randy Bauer?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
The Dirty Vicar?


5. I would never create an anonymous poster who agrees with me.

Jim Eade?
Sam Sloan?
Neil Brennan [sic]?
Stan Booz?
Slam Stoan?


6. I was just researching the Bible to find out an example

Tom Klem?
Wayne Praeder?
The Old Weasel?
Sam Sloan?
George W. Bush?


7. I've always thought of you as a mother. It's just that Teresa was not the next word I had in mind.

Timothy Hanke about Sam Sloan?
Tom Klem about Sam Sloan?
Matt Nemmers about Sam Sloan?
Neil Brennan [sic] about Sam Sloan?
The Old Weasel about Sam Sloan?


8. I have read Mr. Sloan's factual allegations in his affidavit and petition. They are unfounded.

Beatriz Marinello?
Timothy Hanke?
Randy Bauer?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Stan Booz?


9. Hanke is fiundamentally [sic] a bad guy, an evil man

Timothy Hanke?
Randy Bauer?
Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?


10. the spewer of false information on the Internet

Sam Sloan about Wayne Praeder?
Frank Brady about Tim Hanke?
Beatriz Marinello about Sam Sloan?
Stan Booz about Sam Sloan?
Tom Dorsch about Sam Sloan?


11. If President Marinello wishes to sue Mr. Sloan for libel for his statements on the Internet, she may do so

Timothy Hanke?
Randy Bauer?
Stan Booz?
Frank Brady?
Liarry Parr


12. Can you trust Timothy Hanke, USCF Vice President of Finance?

Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Timothy Hanke


13. We all fear certified letters from Sloan. He might be sending urine samples or something equally disgusting.

Randy Bauer?
Stan Booz?
Timothy Hanke?
Matt Nemmers?
Neil Brennan [sic]?


14. It only seems complicated if you read Sam Sloan's demented ravings

Beatriz Marinello?
Randy Bauer?
Stan Booz?
Timothy Hanke?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


15. most female judges in NY are bull dykes

Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
The Dirty Vicar?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


16. Sloan lies and Parr swears to it.

Timothy Hanke?
Randy Bauer?
Stan Booz?
Frank Brady?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


17. Tim Hanke often said on this newsgroup that he wanted to sleep with Beatriz Marinello

Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?


18. That is why Beatriz suddenly wants the Executive Directors job, so that she can steal the money.

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Frank Brady?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?


19. If I were on the USCF Executive Board, I would also refuse a certified letter from Sam Sloan.

Matt Nemmers?
Neil Brennan [sic]?
Frank Brady?
Liarry Parr?
Larry Evans?


20. Sam Sloan is ... a) a malicious liar b) mentally ill c) suffering from brain damage caused by illegal drug use d) an ace journalist who sees things nobody else does e) a schizophrenic who sees things nobody else does (some questions may have more than one correct answer)

Stan Booz?
The Dirty Vicar?
Jim Eade?
Timothy Hanke?
Tom Dorsch?


21. Of course we are really dumb not to want to read about Kayo's alleged vaginal oozes, the warts on Spam Sam's infected dick, the stupid baby's psychological problems and the decades of vile abuse Spam Sam plans for it, the finer points of choosing which table in a hotel lobby to sleep under and how Spam Sam intends to waste our tax dollars that he manages to squeeze from the system in undeserved Social Security.

Jurgen R?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
The Dirty Vicar?
Stan Booz?
Timothy Hanke?


22. Of course, we all know that Beatriz Marinello is not an international terrorist and she is not trying to blow up any buildings. She is just trying to engage in a little honest embezzlement of the traditional type.

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?
Phil Innes?


23. Rumor has it

Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
Stan Booz?
petrel?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


24. Since she has very limited qualifications for the job and would never be hired, using her position on the board to get the job is a form of stealing.

Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Phil Innes?


25. I obtained from a most reliable source

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
The Dirty Vicar?
petrel?


26. I have no idea if it is true or not but it comes from a generally good source

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
Phil Innes?
petrel?


27. I see that all those who thought you had no objective reason for your action must now reconsider, since an impartial consideration by a justice has concurred to freeze half a million dollars pending further developments. I had personally only been asking for an open newsnet discussion.

The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
Phil Innes?
petrel?
George Mirijanian?


28. it might happen that you will learn the truth, the way and the light and will come to the way of the Lord.

Tom Klem?
Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
The Old Weasel?
Jim Eade?


29. Very few people know this, but

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
Phil Innes?
petrel?


30. I would, however, like to see Beatriz sue his ass and take him for everything he owns / What would she do with Sloan's used condom collection?

Matt Nemmers / Stan Booz?
The Masked Sam Sloan / Neil Brennan [sic]?
Timothy Hanke / Matt Nemmers?
Matt Nemmers / Neil Brennan [sic]?
Timothy Hanke / Stan Booz?


31. The movement of a large amount of money like $513,000 on behalf of a foreign national aroused some concerns regarding the Patriot Act.

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
Phil Innes?
petrel?


32. I wonder where some of Scam Sloan's fiscal support has come from.

Neil Brennan [sic]?
Timothy Hanke?
Stan Booz?
Jim Eade?
Randy Bauer?


33. He and Parr are sucking at the same teat.

Neil Brennan [sic]?
Timothy Hanke?
Stan Booz?
Jim Eade?
Randy Bauer?


34. one member wastes the money of all the members on a nuisance suit where he takes the time to defame the officers of the association

Wick Deer?
The Old Weasel?
Don Aldrich?
Kevin Caveman Bachler?
Kenneth M. Chadwell?


35. This will really be a scandal if true.

Sam Sloan?
Phil Innes?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?
Kenneth M. Chadwell?


36. Hopefully, none of my brothers in the NY bar will assist the looney

Wick Deer?
The Old Weasel?
Don Aldrich?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Kenneth M. Chadwell?


37. Kenneth M. Chadwell of the law firm of Looney and Looney

Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?
Stan Booz?


38. You are a pathological liar and a despicable human being.

Stan Booz about Sam Sloan?
Beatriz Marinello about Sam Sloan?
Matt Nemmers about Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan about Sam Sloan?
Timothy Hanke about Sam Sloan?


39. Sam, are you familiar with the consequences of willful perjury, libel, and slander?

Stan Booz?
Beatriz Marinello?
Matt Nemmers?
Jim Eade?
Timothy Hanke?


40. I had my mother and my daughter both KIDNAPPED

The Masked Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
The Old Weasel?
The Dirty Vicar?
Matt Nemmers?


41. Beatriz is a would-be embezzler

Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
The Masked Sam Sloan?
Phil Innes?
petrel?


42. What a fucking imbecile.

Slam Stoan?
The Old Weasel?
The Dirty Vicar?
Matt Nemmers?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


43. Do a search for "zero-cupon bonds" [sic] and you will see what I mean.

Sam Sloan about Mike Nolan?
Sam Sloan about Stan Booz?
Sam Sloan about Kevin Caveman Bachler?
Matt Nemmers about Sam Sloan?
The Masked Sam Sloan about Timothy Hanke?


44. Sam Sloan is just a mentally ill, child molester, peon taxi cab driver that lives in a South Bronx shit hole

Stan Booz?
The Dirty Vicar?
Bugsy Malone?
Matt Nemmers?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


45. It has occurred to me lately that Sam may very well be behind so many of the anonymous posters that come and go here.

Randy Bauer?
Richard Peterson?
Stan Booz?
Bill Goichberg?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


46. his own remarks about other people are often intensely personal, insulting, and gratuitous

Timothy Hanke about Jim Eade?
Timothy Hanke about Sam Sloan?
Timothy Hanke about Liarry Parr?
Liarry Parr about Timothy Hanke?
Liarry Parr about Sam Sloan?


47. Then, poor Beatriz will not get to spend the money as she wishes and will have to go back to selling pet food on the Internet.

The Masked Sam Sloan?
Sam Sloan?
Liarry Parr?
petrel?
Don Schulz?


48. I don't know where Scam Spam, as scandalously vile an individual as one can imagine, gets its ideas of scandal

Randy Bauer?
Richard Peterson?
Stan Booz?
Jerry Bibuld?
The Masked Sam Sloan?


49. he is a gentleman in comparison with Randy Bauer or Stan Booz

Liarry Parr about Jim Eade?
Liarry Parr about Sam Sloan?
Jerry Bibuld about Richard Peterson?
Jerry Bibuld about Timothy Hanke?
Sam Sloan about The Masked Sam Sloan?


50. Any acknowledgement of Sloan's rumor mongering is a mistake.

Randy Bauer?
Wayne Praeder?
Timothy Hanke?
Jurgen R?
Stan Booz?


Here are links:
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Contact address - please send e-mail to the following address: Sloan@ishipress.com