Sam's Movie Reviews: 3000 Miles to Graceland

My girlfriend hornswaggled me into taking her to a movie last night. Actually, it was a pleasure because this was the first time she has ever seen an American movie in America. However, the choice was perhaps unfortunate, because I cannot imagine that this movie will ever be allowed in Japan, and with good reason.

She wanted to see this movie because it appeared to have something to do with Elvis Presley. However, the movie has even less to do with Elvis Presley than the movie "Searching for Bobby Fischer" has to do with Bobby Fischer.

First, the good points: The movie has brilliant photography, lots of good actors, a passable plot, fascinating characters and many memorable scenes.
3000 Miles to Graceland
3000 Miles to Graceland

So, it would seem to have everything. What could possibly be wrong with a movie which has all that?

What is wrong is that the movie carries gratuitous violence to ridiculous levels. Imagine a shoot-em-up scene in which about one hundred police officers have a shoot-out with five bad guys. Is it really possible that all one hundred police officers get killed, while only one bad guy gets it? There is racial discrimination too, because the only bad guy who gets killed by a police officer is the only bad guy who is black. Why do they always kill the only black guy first?

The plot is that Kevin Costner as Murphy, who was born in 1955, believes that he is the illegitimate son of Elvis Presley. He previously filed a claim in Graceland for what he believes to be his rightful inheritance, but his claim was denied, even though a DNA test was done which failed to exclude Presley as his possible father.

Kurt Russell as Michael is a real Elvis lookalike, who just got out of prison after five and a half years and wants to raise enough cash to get back his boat which he inherited from his grandfather and which he left in a boat dock in Seattle, Washington while in prison.

Together, Murphy and Michael plus three other bad guys enter an Elvis Presley lookalike contest at the Riviera Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas where the National Open Chess Championship will be held next week. (I just had to get that in). However, their plan is not so much to win the lookalike contest as it is to rob the hotel of the $3.4 million dollars in prize money. (Chess players take note: This might offer the most likely way to get some of $55,000 in guaranteed prizes at the National Open Chess Championship next week.)

There is the predictable shootout in which one hundred police officers get killed but only one Elvis Presley lookalike gets killed, and he does not look much like Presley because he is black. They get the money and escape from the roof of the Riviera Hotel in a helicopter. The black guy, played by Bokeem Woodbine, gets all bloody and dies, in spite of their valiant efforts to save him, so they throw his dead body out the window from several thousand feet up.

The problem that arises is what to do with the black guy's share of the loot. One of the bad guys, played by Christian Slater, says that the loot should now be split four ways, instead of five. However, Murphy insists that the money should still be split five ways, even though one of the five is dead. They get into an argument over this and Murphy kills the Arquette character.

And so it goes. By the time the movie is over, it is impossible to keep track of the body count, but it must run into hundreds of dead bodies.

Along the way, both Michael and Murphy both pick up airhead girlfriends, who obviously get a sexual thrill out of being associated with such violent and dangerous killers.

Michael's moll, played by Courteney Cox, is neither very young nor very beautiful, but that fits in with the plot because he keeps trying to dump her and she keeps trying to come back to him. She has a brat kid, played by David Kaye, who could become the next child actor super-star.

My Japanese girlfriend was unable to understand the main plot of the movie, so I will explain it. After robbing the Riviera Hotel of $3.4 million, the bad guys realize that the stolen money is probably marked and cannot safely be spent. However, Murphy knows a money washer in Boise Idaho who will exchange the marked money for spendable money at the rate of 70%. Even as the gang members are killing each other, the survivors are trying to get to Boise to exchange the marked money for the good. They keep running into each other along the way, with the predicable result of more killing.

That is about all I can say without ruining the movie. I would like to comment, however, that I once read a book about screenplay writing by Lew Hunter, entitled Lew Hunter's Screenwriting 434. That was said to be the great classic work in the field, but all it really turned out to say was that to have a successful movie you need to have lots of sex and violence.

It is obvious that the director of "3000 Miles to Graceland" has read that great classic work.

Sam Sloan


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