HARD TIMES IN TOKYO, JAPAN

A Screenplay

By Samuel H. Sloan


It is February 1984. We open with a street scene in Shanghai, China and dissolve to the dormitory of a youth hostel, which is a big room with about thirty beds, where a bunch of hippie type European young men and women are laying around discussing their travels. Most of them have back packs.

Our protagonist is named SAM. He tells the others that he is just about broke, down to his last $200.

SAM
"I'm Shanghaied over here. What can I do?"

A young, blond haired boy from Finland, in heavily accented and broken English, states:

FINNISH BOY
You can always make money teaching English in Japan. That's where I get my traveling money from. I make $15 per hour teaching English there. No problem. Also, I've hitchhiked all over Japan.

The next morning, Sam goes to the Japanese consulate in Shanghai and applies for a visa. He has spruced himself up and looks much better than on the previous day. Still, the Japanese vice-consul eyes him with extreme suspicion.

SAM
I came to Shanghai from America on computer business. Now, my company wants me to make a side trip to Japan. That's why I didn't apply for a visa in America.

This is, of course, a lie. However, the Japanese vice-consul finally gives Sam a visa.

Sam barely has enough money to buy a one-way ticket from Shanghai, China to Nagasaki, Japan, which is the nearest city in Japan with a direct flight from Shanghai. Upon arrival in Nagasaki, Sam stands on the freeway, trying to hitchhike. The Japanese police pick Sam up in a patrol car and warn him that it is illegal to hitchhike on the freeway. They drive Sam to a better spot, near the entrance to a major freeway. Sam catches a ride and starts his journey of hitchhiking to Tokyo.

Sam makes good progress and catches several rides. On about the fourth ride, he is picked up by three Japanese teenagers, two boys and a girl. By now, it is nighttime. The girl is very beautiful. She sits in the front seat between the two boys, but it seems that every chance she gets she turns around and smiles at Sam.

Soon, they go off the highway and stop at a private building. Sam and the three teenagers go inside. They wake up two other boys who are asleep on futons on the floor. This is obviously an office where business is done. After an agitated discussion, the four boys quickly leave, leaving Sam alone with the girl. The girl sits demurely on the floor and smiles radiantly at Sam, although she says nothing. She is very, very beautiful. Unfortunately for Sam, only a few minutes later, the boys excitedly charge back in the door and motion for Sam to come with them and get in the car. Sam gets in the car, leaving the girl behind. The four boys take Sam out to the freeway and leave Sam there to hitchhike some more.

Sam continues to hitchhike all through the night and through the next day. The last ride is a long ride with two Japanese businessmen. Incongruously, they play an American song entitled, "I Love Everything About My Boyfriend" over and over on their cassette player during the trip.

The two businessmen drop Sam off at Tokyo Station in downtown Tokyo. Sam finds his way to the tourist information booth and is given directions to the youth hostel in Ichigaya, where he spends the night.

[Skip to page 62 of script]

INT. THE OFFICE IN MARIO'S ENGLISH LANGUAGE SCHOOL ONE SUNDAY AFTERNOON

Sam is sitting there alone. The telephone rings. Sam answers.

SAM
Hello.

Silence.

SAM
Hello.

Finally, a low, almost whispering, voice speaks.

ATSUKO
Sam. Do you know who this is?

SAM
No. I'm sorry. Who is this?

ATSUKO
This is Atsuko. Do you remember me?

SAM
Oh. Atsuko. Of course I remember you. I was just thinking about you the other day.

Silence.

SAM
I would like to meet you.

Silence. Finally, after a long pause, Atsuko speaks.

ATSUKO
When can you meet me?

SAM
Oh. Anytime.

ATSUKO
How about right now?

SAM
Okay.

ATSUKO
Can you meet me at the Hanzomon Station in a half hour? That is in Sanban-cho near Kojimachi.

SAM
Sure. Fine.

ATSUKO
Hai ("yes" while simultaneously inhaling, expressing gratitude in that certain special way that only Japanese women can do.)

Atsuko hangs up the telephone. Sam puts on his coat and leaves Mario's office.

EXT. SHIN-OCHANOMIZU STATION. AFTERNOON

Atsuko meets Sam as he comes past the ticket taker. They walk together. Hardly speaking at all. She takes him directly to her place. They take the elevator up to her three-mat room.

INT. ATSUKO'S THREE-MAT ROOM

Sam and Atsuko sit nervously on the mats to her room. There is no furniture. Only three tatami mats. A long time passes and almost nothing is said. Finally, Sam looks at his watch.

SAM
Let's go for coffee. Walk around a little bit.

Sam and Atsuko leave, take the elevator downstairs. Go to a coffee shop. Still say almost nothing. Sam rises.

SAM
I'll get the check.

Sam pays the check. Leaves with Atsuko. They go back to her three mat room. Again they sit for a long time.

SAM
(looking at his watch) It's getting late. I'd better go back.

Sam tries to rise to his feet. However, he has been sitting on the floor for a long time, Japanese style. As Sam tries to stand up, he loses his balance, falls over and lands directly on Atsuko. Atsuko topples over backwards. Lands on her back on the floor. Atsuko is now spread-eagled, with Sam directly on top of her.

ATSUKO
Okay. I'll do it.

SAM
Do what?

ATSUKO
But you must promise one thing. Don't tell Mario.

SAM
Tell Mario what? Why should I tell Mario anything?

Sam surveys the scene. Atsuko is lying on her back, spread-eagled on the floor. Her head is lying on the side. Her eyes are closed. She is completely passive. Suddenly, Sam understands.

SAM
Oh. I see.

Sam unzips Atsuko, pulls her pants off only. Sam performs cunnalingus by eating Atsuko's pussy. When Sam has got Atsuko good and juiced up, he removes the rest of her clothing. Then Sam removes all of his own clothing. He gets on her, sticks his dick in her mouth. (Remember, however, that this has to be an "R" rated movie.) Atsuko performs fellatio by giving Sam a blow job. Now, Atsuko becomes active, flips Sam on his back. Gives Sam a better blow job. Atsuko gets ready to mount Sam.

ATSUKO
Before I do this, you must promise one thing. You must promise not to tell Mario.

SAM
(nodding his head) Okay. I promise.

ATSUKO
And another thing. I want you to come outside of me, like Mario does. I don't want baby.

Sam nods his head affirmatively. Atsuko mounts Sam. They fuck for a long time.

SAM
Now, I'm going to show you something. Hang on. This has to be done in exactly the right way.

Sam holds Atsuko by the rib cage. In a sweeping motion, rolls the two of them over so that now Sam is on the top, but his penis has never left her vagina during this operation.

SAM
Got it. You're a good learner.

From now on, they both fuck much harder. Sam hooks his arms under Atsuko's legs, brings her ankles up around his neck. Bends her over in a jackknifed position. Fucks Atsuko very hard. Sam lets go of Atsuko's legs, but she keeps her legs up anyway. Sam bangs the shit out of Atsuko. Finally, both of them are panting, gasping for breath and covered with beads of sweat. Sam falls over on the floor.

Only a few minutes later, Atsuko shakes Sam.

ATSUKO
You can't sleep here. Mario might come. You can never tell when he might drop by. All hours of the day or night. You have to go.

Sam reluctantly rises and gets dressed. Sam is ready to leave, while Atsuko sits demurely on the floor.

ATSUKO
Remember. You promised. You promised not to tell Mario.

SAM
Of course. Why should I tell Mario?

Sam leaves. Goes to the sento (Japanese public bath) to bathe.

INT. A TYPICAL PUBLIC BATH IN JAPAN

Sam enters the sento, removes his shoes. Sam fails to notice that in this particular sento, unlike almost all others, the women's side is on the right, whereas the men's side is on the left. There is a sign in Japanese, but Sam can't read this. Sam goes into the women's side by mistake. Sees a bunch of naked, mostly middle-aged Japanese women. They hardly notice. Sam corrects his mistake, goes into the men's side. Sam soaps down Japanese style, washes. Finally gets into the hot bath with a bunch of naked, Japanese men. Sam reads the thermometer. It reads 45 degrees centigrade (which is 113 degrees Fahrenheit).

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE

The telephone rings. Sam answers.

MARIO JUNIOR (on the telephone)
Sam, I'm in trouble. I have one more girl than I can handle. You've got to get over here right away.

SAM
What do you mean?

MARIO JUNIOR
Just get over here. I have too many girls. I'll explain when you get here.

Sam puts on his coat and leaves Mario's office.

Sam walks to Mario Junior's apartment in Roppongi, a twenty minute walk. Mario Junior lives in a "2KD" apartment, on a back side street, far but walking distance from Roppongi's center of night life. Obviously, this apartment is strategically located so that Mario Junior can pick up girls in Roppongi, a center of night life, and then bring them to his apartment.

INT. MARIO JUNIOR'S 2KD APARTMENT

Sam knocks on the door. Mario Junior answers.

MARIO JUNIOR
Thank goodness you came!

Mario Junior lets Sam in. Two girls are seated on the floor, Japanese style. Mario Junior tells Sam to sit down, in between the two girls.

One girl is 19, the other is 20. The 19-year-old is absolutely the most beautiful girl Sam has ever seen, anywhere in Japan. The 20-year-old is plain and dull looking. You can just imagine which one Mario Junior wants to give to Sam. Mario Junior sits on the other side, so the four of them now form a circle.

SAM
Now. What's this all about?

MARIO JUNIOR
It's like this. I always tell these broads not to come here without calling first. Of course, I leave my telephone answering machine on when I have another broad here, so that they won't find each other. But this time, I'm bringing this broad home, when this other broad comes up right behind us. Turns out, she's been waiting outside of my house for me for the last several hours. So, what can I do? I have to invite both of them in. So, now I'm stuck with two broads, which, in Japan, is one broad too many. So, now, I'm going to give this broad to you, and keep this other one over here for myself.

SAM
Fine. So what's supposed to happen now?

MARIO JUNIOR
First, I'm going to tell your broad that we have to go for a walk. Of course, she'll agree. She wants to get me away from the other one, anyway. Then, when we're outside, I'll explain the situation to your broad, tell her that you'll accommodate her. Then, she'll be outside. I know she's going to bitch and complain, but I won't let her come back in here.

SAM
What about that one?

By now, the very beautiful girl has laid her head on the side of Mario Junior's bed and is fast asleep, even though she is sitting upright, Japanese style.

MARIO JUNIOR
Don't worry about her. I'm going to dick her just as soon as I can get you two guys out of here. Then I'll let her sleep for a while. But then she's going to have to be leaving here soon. I've got another broad coming by early in the morning.

SAM
But, what am I going to do with the one you're giving me. Where can I take her? It's the middle of the night. It's freezing outside. All the places are closed. I have no money anyway. The last train left long ago. The subways are closed for the night. It'll be nearly five o'clock in the morning before they open again.

MARIO JUNIOR
Exactly the point. She has no place to go. So, you'll just have to take pity on the poor girl, take her to my father's office, and fuck her there. What else can she do? There's a big armchair in the back of my father's office. It pulls out into a bed. You can fuck her there. That's what it's there for. You won't have any problem. Don't worry.

SAM
But, why call me? Why didn't you just keep her here?

MARIO JUNIOR
That's what she's asking me to do.

SAM
So, what's the problem. Let them both sleep here, and then fuck 'em both. That's what we used to do back in Berkeley.

MARIO JUNIOR
That's California style. That shit doesn't work here in Japan. These broads are too conservative here. If you want to fuck 'em, you have to fuck 'em in private. If I let them both sleep here, I won't be able to fuck either one of 'em.

Mario Junior speaks a few words to the 20-year-old in Japanese. Then Sam, Mario Junior and the 20-year-old get up and go out, leaving the other one sound asleep, still leaning against Mario Junior's bed. They three go outside.

EXT. ON THE STREET AT NIGHT

Mario Junior talks to the 20-year-old in Japanese (which, of course, he speaks fluently). She is agitated, argues vehemently. Finally, Mario Junior translates to Sam.

MARIO JUNIOR
She's saying she has the first right to me. She fucked me first, long before I ever met the other one. She says she's entitled to at least equal status. I should at least allow her to sleep there. It's the middle of the night. She missed the last train. But I told her it isn't like that. She knows she's supposed to call me before she comes. She says she called many, many times. Of course, it's true, but I never picked up. You see how many beautiful broads I have. I just can't fit her into my schedule any more. She's all yours now.

SAM
But, what about the other one you left behind? She's sound asleep. Are you just going to wake her up and fuck her, just like that?

MARIO JUNIOR
Don't worry about me. I can handle it. I've got lots of experience. Done this many times.

Sam leaves with his newly acquired companion. Mario Junior turns and goes back to his apartment.

[Skip to Page 84 of the Script]

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE

Sam is on the telephone with Reimer.

REIMER
I know how you can get laid. As long as you can get a hard on, you can't miss.

SAM
I'm not interested in hookers.

REIMER
These are not hookers. Anyway, you couldn't afford a hooker in Japan. There are plenty of hookers in Japan, but they charge at least $250 for fifteen minutes. You couldn't afford them.

SAM
Then, what is it?

REIMER
These are performing artists. Here in Japan, we have live sex on stage, but with audience participation. There are lots of places like that all over Japan. You go inside. There will be girls doing acts on stage. If you see one you like, you can go up and fuck her, but you have to do it on stage, in front of the audience. You can have any girl you want, as long as you can get a hard on with all those people watching.

SAM
I have difficulty believing this.

REIMER
No problem. I'll take you to see one tomorrow night. It's in Kabuki-cho in Shinjuku. It's called the TS Music. It's behind the giant mechanical crab.

EXT. KABUKI-CHO IN SHINJUKU AT NIGHT

Reimer takes Sam to the TS Music in Kabuki-cho. They each pay 1500 yen and enter the show.

INT. THE SHINJUKU TS MUSIC IN KABUKI-CHO

Sam and Reimer sit in the audience. A succession of Japanese girls get on the stage and strip. One by one they do a strip dance. When each one is finally naked, some Japanese businessman in the audience climbs on stage and has sex with her. This is known in Japanese as a Namaita style show. By the end of the evening, every Japanese salaryman in the audience has been laid, some of them two or three times. Sam and Reimer are almost the only ones who do not participate. Sam is bored and unimpressed.

INT. SHINJUKU SHOGI CENTER

It is Saturday night. Sam is playing shogi with an opponent. Sam looks at his watch and suddenly realizes that he is about to miss the last train. Sam apologizes to his opponent, runs out the door.

EXT. THE AREA OF SHINJUKU STATION AT NIGHT

Sam runs from the Shinjuku Shogi Center on Yasakuni Dori to Shinjuku Station. Sam pays his way in and runs up the stairs to the platform. When Sam arrives, the train is just pulling out of the station. Sam has missed the last train and is stuck in Shinjuku for the night.

Sam now walks around Shinjuku. Sam enters Kabuki-cho, walks around, finds the giant mechanical crab on the wall, and finds the TS Music behind it. Sam pays 1500 yen and enters the TS Music.

INT. THE TS MUSIC IN KABUKI-CHO

The usual crowd of about 100 Japanese salarymen are sitting around the stage. The stage is a "T" shape. Sometimes the girls dance and strip on the main stage and sometimes they come out on the platform, lay down and have sex there with volunteers from the audience. This is a Namaita style show. There is a futon on the platform where the girl lays down when she has sex with a man. Stage hands come on and change these futons at appropriate times. Each act lasts 15 minutes. Often, the girl will sing or dance a little before laying down and having sex. Usually, a girl will have sex with two men in her act. If the men are quick enough, sometimes she will look at her watch and say that she has time for a third. Almost always, the girl performs fellatio on the man first, giving him a blow job. If the girls are not especially beautiful, sometimes two at a time come out and have sex with men. Not all the acts involve sex with the audience. There are other performances, magic tricks and even comedy skits. There are a total of eight acts in rotation. Thus, a total of two hours will pass before the same act comes back around again.

Not all of the girls on stage are Japanese. One is a foreigner. She gets on stage. She is tall and statuesque and has long blond hair and blue eyes. Sam can recognize her accent. She is American.

The crowd of 100 Japanese salarymen all look bored. It is late at night and some of them are sleepy. Undoubtedly, most if not all of them have been laid at least once already tonight. They slouch in their chairs, apparently uninterested.

The American girl is really quite beautiful. She struts back and forth on the platform. She does her strip tease and finally strips naked. The crowd is still bored. Nobody volunteers to come up and have sex with her.

AMERICAN GIRL
Come on you guys. What's the matter?

No response.

AMERICAN GIRL
Okay. I'm ready. Will one of you guys get up here?

Still no response.
Now, the American girl sits down on the stage.

AMERICAN GIRL
How do think this makes me feel? Please, will somebody get up here and fuck me? I'm a person. I have feelings, too. Don't you understand? This is my job. I'm paid to do this. If nobody wants to fuck me, I'll get fired.

The American girl points to a man in the audience.

AMERICAN GIRL
How about you? Come up here.

One Japanese salaryman in the audience slowly and reluctantly gets on stage. The American girl lays him down on the futon, strips him naked, gives him a blow job and then climbs on and has sex with him. When the sex act is finished, the man gets up and gets dressed and they both leave the stage.

Next on stage is a beautiful young Japanese girl wearing a blue high school uniform with a spotless white blouse. Her stage name is HIRATSUKA KAZUMI. She appears to be about 15 years old. She has that look of total innocence. In her act, she holds a high school baton, does a little high school dance and sings "Mikan no hana", a little children's song, just as all Japanese high school girls typically do.

Sam gets bored. Sam yawns. Sam is thinking, "This is obviously a little skit, in between the serious acts. I wonder why they let a girl this young into a place like this?"

Sam looks around the room. He notices that all the Japanese salarymen are now sitting bolt upright in their chairs. No longer is anyone looking slouched or sleepy-eyed. "What's the big deal", thinks Sam, "We see high school girls like this in the street every day."

Hiratsuka Kazumi completes her little dance and her little song. She then retreats demurely to a far corner of the stage. Suddenly, almost the entire audience (except for Sam, of course) jumps onto the stage simultaneously. There is pushing and shoving. Some men lose their balance and fall off the stage.

The men remaining on the stage now divide into groups of four or five and start playing a game of "Jon, Ken, Pone." This is a game known in America as "Scissors, Paper, Stone", i.e. the scissors cuts the paper, the paper wraps the stone and the stone breaks the scissors.

Now, all the men in their various groups say "Jon Ken Pone" almost simultaneously as they compete against each other. As the games are decided, the losers jump off the stage. Each group of four produces a winner. The winners face each other. Finally, a grand champion emerges from all the groups. All the losers jump off stage. Finally, there is only one Japanese salaryman left on the stage, plus Hiratsuka Kazumi who is still standing demurely in the corner waiting for the results of the competition.

Stage hands come on and bring a big futon plus other props. Music starts. Hiratsuka Kazumi motions for the winner to lay down on the futon. He lays down, and then she lays down next to him. She is wearing a spotless white blouse. She motions for the man just to unbutton the top button of her blouse only. He complies. She then points to the second button and he unbuttons that one as well. Slowly, following her directions, he unbuttons her entire blouse, revealing an exceptionally large breast, especially by Japanese standards. Now, Hiratsuka Kazumi undresses completely and then helps the Japanese salaryman take off all of his clothing.

Now, they are both naked. Hiratsuka Kazumi gives the salaryman a blow job. She is now facing the back of the stage, while he is facing forward. Once he has a hard on, Hiratsuka Kazumi mounts him.

However, now a surprising thing happens. The Japanese salaryman loses his hard on. Hiratsuka Kazumi gets off and tries again, but still the man can't get it up. Finally, he gets dressed and leaves the stage.

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE

Rogers enters the office. It's morning. Sam is on the floor trying to sleep.

ROGERS
Time to get up. It's late.

SAM
I haven't even gone to sleep yet. I couldn't sleep all night thinking about this girl. Look, Rogers. There's this high school girl. I've been thinking about her all week long. I can't get her out of my mind. I can hardly sleep because of her. So, I've decided. I'm going to go to Tokyo tomorrow and fuck the high school girl.

ROGERS
But what about the 20 or 30 Japanese salarymen that you will have to beat at a game of jon ken pone?

SAM
Rogers, by now you should know one thing about me, which is that I can win at games. Of course, I still can't beat my friend Bobby Fischer at chess, but that is an exceptional case. Against a bunch of average Japanese salarymen, I should be able to beat them at any game, including even jon ken pone. The only question in my mind is: Can I really get a hard on with such a large crowd watching, with the spotlights and so on?

That night Reimer calls.

SAM
Hello.

REIMER
How's it going over there?

SAM
Look. That place you sent me to, the TS Music. Turns out that there's an absolutely stunning beautiful girl there who looks like she's not more than 15 years old and she fucks on stage.

REIMER
What of it? They've girls like that all over.

SAM
Maybe so, but I've never seen one like this. Anyway, I realize that she is not exactly what you would call a virtuous woman, but she has been burning in my brain so much, that I can't help it. I've made up my mind. Tomorrow, I'm going to Tokyo to fuck her.

REIMER
How're you going to do that?

SAM
Easy. I'm going to get up on stage and fuck her. But, there's a funny thing about this girl. She's so beautiful, but nobody can get a hard on with her. All the other girls just keep fucking. The guys always get a hard on with the other girls, but they can never get a hard on with this beautiful girl. I don't know the reason. I'm worried about that.

REIMER
The last thing you should do is worry about that. Then, you won't be able to get a hard on for sure. But you have a bigger problem. What if there are some other guys who want to fuck the same girl?

SAM
That's no problem.

REIMER
But, you will have to beat them all at jon ken pone.

SAM
I'm not worried about that. If I concentrate hard and watch my opponents, I can beat them. I'm confident of that. It's just another game, and I'm good at games.

REIMER
Look, you may be good at chess and games like that, but those guys have been playing jon ken pone all their lives. They've been playing it since they were children. All Japanese people play it. That's how they resolve their disputes. In America, if we have a dispute with another guy, we punch him out or get out our Uzi and blow him away or something like that. Here in Japan, they just play jon ken pone, instead. Even if they get into a dispute over a woman, they just play jon ken pone. Whomever wins gets the girl.

SAM
Look. They may have been playing this game all their lives, but they're still just a bunch of guys with average intelligence. Do they have the shodan menjo in jon ken pone? Of course not. They're just a bunch of average guys with average intelligence. This means that I can beat them.

REIMER
Okay. If you think that you can beat about 20 Japanese salarymen at a little game of jon ken pone, just be my guest. Go right ahead!

INT. TS MUSIC IN KABUKI-CHO

Sam buys a ticket, enters the TS Music and seats himself in the audience. A girl is stripping and doing her act on stage. Sam waits through this and several other acts. Finally, Hiratsuka Kazumi comes on stage, wearing the same blue high school uniform. She sings her little song and does her little dance, exactly as before. Then, following her usual routine, she retreats to the rear of the stage.

A bunch of Japanese salarymen jump on stage, and Sam jumps on stage too. The men divide themselves into groups of four. They play jon ken pone. Sam wins the first round. Two of his opponents concede defeat and jump off stage, leaving just one. Sam defeats him. Now, Sam is the winner of his group. All the losers from the other groups jump off. Now, there are enough men left for two groups of four. Sam wins his group again. The losers jump off. Now, there is only Sam and one other contestant left on stage.

Sam and his opponent square off. They say jon ken pone. It's a tie. They say jon ken pone again. It's another tie. They say jon ken pone a third time. This time Sam wins. Sam's opponent bows in defeat and jumps off stage. Now, Sam is left alone on the stage with Hiratsuka Kazumi. This entire competition has lasted less than one or two minutes.

Now, exactly the same thing happens as before. The stage hands bring out their props. The music starts. Hiratsuka Kazumi motions for Sam to lay down and then Hiratsuka Kazumi lays down beside him. Hiratsuka Kazumi motions for him to unbutton the top button of her blouse and so on. Just as before, he undresses her and then she undresses him. Now, Hiratsuka Kazumi sucks Sam's dick a little bit and then mounts him. Hiratsuka Kazumi puts it in.

Sam is now fucking one of the most beautiful women of his life. Suddenly, Sam realizes that there is a problem. Although he is completely inside her, he barely has a hard on and he is rapidly losing what little he has left. Worse yet, the spotlight is shining directly in his eyes. Sam is losing his concentration. Sam shields his eyes. He can barely see Hiratsuka Kazumi. Now, Sam realizes what the reason is why all those other men couldn't get a hard on with Hiratsuka Kazumi. Sam is really worried now. He is afraid that he might fail. Sam is going to lose his chance if he does not do something soon.

(During this time, the camera shows a blinding light, only out of the corner of which Sam can see Hiratsuka Kazumi mounted over him.)

Sam reaches up, takes Hiratsuka Kazumi by the shoulders, and flips her over on her back. Now, Sam is on top of her, without ever coming outside of her. Hiratsuka Kazumi is astonished. Apparently nobody has done this before. She protests mildly, looks shocked. She exclaims something in Japanese. But, what can she say?

Now, Sam is on top of Hiratsuka Kazumi. Instantly, Sam has a really strong hard on; the doubts in his mind have been erased. Sam proceeds to fuck the shit out of Hiratsuka Kazumi. Sam puts his arms under Hiratsuka Kazumi's legs and pulls her ankles up to around his neck. Since the crowd is seated behind them, they can see clearly, of course. Sam grits his teeth, as he bangs the shit out of Hiratsuka Kazumi.

Sam finishes, lets her legs down. Sam stands up to get dressed. The crowd stands up and gives a thunderous, cheering applause. Even the few Japanese salarywomen (there are a few in the audience) applause. They climb on their chairs and look. Sam gets dressed and leaves the stage.

EXT. ON THE STREET NEAR THE TS MUSIC

Sam is walking around Kabuki-cho. He looks through the glass door of a restaurant, and there he sees Hiratsuka Kazumi eating noodles with two other women. One is another girl who does sex at the same show. The other is an older obviously lesbian bull-dyke type woman.

Sam looks at his watch and thinks about approaching Hiratsuka Kazumi. Just then, an American Cadillac of the type notoriously driven by the Yakuza (Japanese gangsters) drives up to the door of the restaurant. The driver has a tattoo and looks very much like the Yakuza who was confronted by Reimer earlier in the train. (Perhaps he is the same person.) Hiratsuka Kazumi and the other two women come out of the restaurant, get in the Cadillac and the driver drives off.

[Skip to page 97 of the script]

EXT. SENDAGAYA STATION TOKYO DAYTIME

Sam walks from Sendagaya Station to the Nihon Shogi Renmei.

INT. THE NIHON SHOGI RENMEI

Sam enters the playing room. An attractive girl is sitting there taking the entries. This is the same girl who was present when Sam first came to the club as a beginner one month ago. She looks shocked when she realizes that Sam wants to enter the shodan promotion tournament. She had written down the word for seven-kyu in Japanese. She now crosses it out and corrects it to one-kyu.

Unfortunately, Rogers is right. Sam comes nowhere close to winning. Actually, he wins three games and loses two, but the two loses are total defeats. After the competition is over, Onogi approaches Sam.

ONOGI
Sam-san, you have won three games out of five. Under our rules, if you win all five games, you win the shodan menjo. However, if you win only four, you may still have the menjo, but you must pay five thousand yen. Finally, if you win three games, you may still have the menjo, but only if you pay ten thousand yen. Therefore, if you give me ten thousand yen, I will order a menjo for you. Do you want it?

SAM
Thank you but I'm sorry. The menjo is meaningless to me, unless I win it legitimately by winning all the games.

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE

The telephone rings. Rogers answers. Rogers talks on the telephone in Japanese and then turns to Sam.

ROGERS
It's Onogi. The Nihon Shogi Renmei will be holding its annual World Amateur Shogi Championship soon. Every country has a representative. Onogi wants you to represent the U.S.A. There are higher ranked players in America, but they can't come this year, and you are the best they know of now. Would you be willing to play, he wants to know.

SAM
Sure. I'd be honored to represent my country.

EXT. THE NEW OTANI HOTEL IN TOKYO

The New Otani Hotel in Tokyo is considered to be one of the finest hotels in the world. The Nihon Shogi Renmei has decided to hold its official reception here. Sam enters. There are lots of hors d'oeuvres and a fancy environment. Sam gorges himself on the free food. There are also television cameras, plus newspaper reporters and photographers. Sam is treated like a visiting celebrity.

The next day, the competition begins. Sam is paired against the representative from France and wins his first round game. In the second round, Sam faces the representative from Turkey. His name is Asad Kurbanali. Unfortunately for Sam, he is a much tougher opponent. He was actually born in Japan and has lived all his life here. He is a Turkish diplomat, working in the Turkish Embassy. He wipes Sam out and wins the game easily.

Sam is now placed in a consolation group, which he wins. Sam wins an exciting last round game against the representative from Canada. As a result, Sam finishes fifth in the competition. Asad Kurbanali finishes second, after being defeated by a boy from Brazil who is half Japanese.

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE DAYTIME

SAM
Rogers, I have an idea. There is a shogi computer program on the market. It sells a lot of copies even though it is quite weak. I think that I can write a better program and hopefully make a lot of money. What do you think?

ROGERS
That's not so easy. There are a lot of computer programmers working on things like that. However, if you want to try, go ahead. I have an extra computer you can use over there.

Sam spends the next several months hunched over a computer, writing his shogi computer program.

One day the telephone rings. Rogers answers.

ROGERS
It's for you, Sam.

Sam goes to the telephone

SAM
Hello.

MARIO JUNIOR
Hey. Sam. It's Mario. Remember me?

SAM
Sure. How could I forget.

MARIO JUNIOR
Hey. Let's let bygones be bygones and meet sometime. What say I invite you to lunch? We can meet at the coffee shop opposite Shimbashi Station. Don't worry. I'm buying.

SAM
Okay. I guess I can manage that.

INT. A COFFEE SHOP NEAR SHIMBASHI STATION

Sam enters the coffee shop. Mario Junior is already waiting for him. Mario Junior waves Sam over. Sam sits. Mario Junior orders coffee for both of them.

The coffee arrives. Suddenly, Mario Senior appears from nowhere. Sam realizes that he has been set up. Sam rises to leave.

Mario Senior puts his hand on Sam's shoulder, pressing him down.

MARIO
It's alight. It's all over Sam. Atsuko has confessed. We know she did it.

MARIO JUNIOR
Atsuko did it? Atsuko and Sam? I didn't even know they knew each other.

MARIO
Oh. They know each other all right. Intimately. Yes. It was Atsuko. She was the broad who laid Sam. I should have known it all along. Atsuko gave Sam his first piece of ass in Japan.

Mario Senior bangs his fist on the table.

MARIO JUNIOR
But, how did you find out?

Mario Senior goes into his Sherlock Holmes mode.

MARIO
Elementary. You see, I knew that it had to be a broad that we knew, because Sam had just arrived in Japan. He didn't know any broads other than the ones we had introduced him to. Therefore, I made a list of every broad who knew or had even heard of Sam. Every broad was on the list. There was Yoko, Tomoko, CPO, Noodles, Pine Village, Fifty Storms, the One on the Left, the One on my Right and even the B.C., I wouldn't put it past her. And, of course, there was Atsuko.

After that, I took out each broad on the list, one by one. I took them to dinner. Finally, I would bring up the subject. I would say, 'It's too bad about Sam. And he's such a nice guy, too.'

Then the broad might answer, 'What's bad about Sam'. Then I would say, 'Well, tragically, Sam has Binrumania.'

The broad would answer, 'What's Binrumania?' I answered, 'Binrumania is an extremely rare but virulent form of venereal disease, which results in a certain and painful death.'

When I said that to the other broads, like Tomoko, Yoko, Hiromi and Noodles, they just seemed bored and changed the subject. However, when I said that to Atsuko, she turned as white as a sheet, so I said, 'You haven't had sex with Sam, have you, because, if you have, I have to get you to the doctor right away!'

So, Atsuko confessed. She had had sex with Sam. Naturally, I rushed Atsuko to the doctor right away. I took her to a doctor I always go to whenever I have V.D. Atsuko told the doctor in my presence that she had had sex with Sam. The doctor gave her all kinds of tests. He couldn't find anything, but there's always the incubation period. I told Atsuko that Sam had contracted this disease when he was up in the remote hills of Afghanistan, and the doctors around here wouldn't know about that.

After that, Atsuko went back to her home town to check into the hospital and for a series of medical tests. She's there now.

Atsuko also says that Sam didn't come outside of her when they had sex. She thinks she's pregnant. She says that if she is pregnant, she's going to have an abortion.

Throughout this, Sam sits glumly and remains silent. Now, Mario, who has been addressing Mario Junior up until now, turns to Sam with a big smile on his face

MARIO
Congratulations, Sam. How did it feel finally, at long, long last, to get your first piece of pussy in Japan!

INT. MARIO JUNIOR'S APARTMENT IN ROPPONGI

Sam knocks at the door. Mario Junior answers.

MARIO JUNIOR
You should have called before you came but, anyway, come in.

Mario Junior and Sam sit and talk about nothing particular. Then, Mario Junior points to his bed, which has a rumpled blanket on it.

MARIO JUNIOR
Take a look at that bed. What do you think about that?

SAM
It looks like a bed.

MARIO JUNIOR
Yea. But what's on it?

SAM
A blanket.

MARIO JUNIOR
But is there anything under the blanket?

SAM
Now that you mention it, something might be under there.

MARIO JUNIOR
Well, why don't you look under the blanket and see what's there.

Sam walks over to the bed and peeks under the blanket. It's Hiromi. She has an impish smile on her face.

SAM
Why, if it isn't good old CPO.

MARIO JUNIOR
Watch it! She knows more English than you think.

Sam returns and sits down.

SAM
With all the broads you've got, I'm surprised that you find time in your busy schedule for CPO.

MARIO JUNIOR
Actually, I felt sorry for the broad. She calls me all the time, asking to come over here. She's such a sweet girl. She'll do anything for me. So, I decided to give her a break.

SAM
By the way, does CPO know that her name is CPO?

MARIO JUNIOR
Heck no! And don't tell her either. If she finds out, we'll have to think of another name for her.

Anyway, Sam, I still don't know what's the matter with you. I think that you're afraid of girls or something. There's one billion broads over here. One billion! Let me tell you what happened to me about two weeks ago. There's this girl's high school near here in Roppongi.

SAM
Would that be the Toyo Eiwa Jogakuin?

MARIO JUNIOR
Jeez. How'd you know.

SAM
Nothing. I just heard of it.

MARIO JUNIOR
Amazing. You just got to Japan and already you know about the Toyo Eiwa Jogakuin. Anyway, so I'm walking down the street and there's these three high school girls in high school uniforms standing on the street and they're looking at me! So, I go over and talk to them and one of them gives me her telephone number. So, I call her up and she's 17 and she says that she wants to meet me. So I agree to meet her at the koban and I meet her there and straight away I bring her here and I lay the broad right away.

Then, a few days later, the second broad calls me. So, I agree to meet her at the same koban, and I bring her here and right away I lay her, just like I laid the first one.

Then a few more days go by and the third broad calls up, and I meet her at the koban and I bring her here and I lay her right away just like I laid her two friends. I laid them all right in the bed over there where CPO is sleeping.

Now, these three broads all take the same classes together in high school. Don't you see? They're passing me around, treating me like a sex object. They think that I have no feelings, no dignity, and no self respect. It's a tough life, you know? Let me tell you Sam. If you want a virgin girl these days in Tokyo, she's got to be at least 26 years old. The younger ones have all given it away long ago.

While Mario Junior has been saying this, Hiromi, who is still on the bed and under the blankets, reaches out with one arm, grabs her clothing, and pulls it under the covers. Then, Hiromi dresses under the blankets. Finally, Hiromi is dressed and emerges from under the blankets and sits down next to Mario Junior. Hiromi smiles radiantly at Mario Junior and Sam.

SAM
Incidentally, aren't you reluctant to discuss such subjects in front of CPO. She's been hanging out with you guys for the last two years. She must understand some English by now. If she hears you talk like that, maybe she won't give you any.

MARIO JUNIOR
Forget it. It's in the bag. She's lucky to get in here, and she knows it. Actually, I'm glad that you came by and she got up. Another broad wants to come by. She's got to go soon. So what have you been up to lately?

SAM
I'm trying to get my shogi shodan menjo. I'm almost there. I keep missing it by one game. I have to win eight games in a row to get it.

HIROMI
(holding up two fingers) Me ni-dan soroban.

MARIO JUNIOR
Yea. Hiromi's got the ni-dan in abacus. You would never know it, but Hiromi's really smart. That's why she has her job in Ginza.

Hiromi, isn't it time for you to go to your part time job?

HIROMI
Arbeit nein des.

MARIO JUNIOR
She says that she doesn't have her part time job today.

Well, I think you'd better be going soon anyway, Hiromi.

Sam, Hiromi has a part time job now at a fancy club in Ginza. She's the receptionist. The first thing the customers see when they walk in the club is Hiromi. She wears a fancy kimono. They always put the most beautiful girl in the club at the front door. She says that she doesn't do sex with the customers, though. The other girls do, but she doesn't. I believe her. That's what she says.

By now, Hiromi is puttering around Mario Junior's 2KD apartment, washing the dishes and tidying up.

SAM
I've got to get out of here. I don't want Hiromi to think that she has to leave because of me.

MARIO JUNIOR
No. She's got to get out of here, because I've got another broad coming by soon.

[Continued]

UPDATE: This story is now the subject of a cable TV Show: Brooklyn Boy Makes Good in Japan.


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